I am not sure about having an alert for the listener.
Have you considered the option of Using AES(Autonomic Event Services)? If not,
- Introduction to Pega Autonomic Event ServicesFrom one console, you can manage requestors, agents, and listeners across your enterprise. As shown here on the Requestors form, you can stop, interrupt, get clipboard size, and so on for each requestor on every node.
To answer your question "How to know who stopped our Listener?"
- When a listener is stopped by an operator, it's get noted in the Pega RULES logs file for the particular node on which listener was up and running and I got it confirmed from one of SME about it that it's the only way to identify.